Addiction is a chronic disease characterized by drug seeking and use that is compulsive, or difficult to control, despite harmful consequences. The initial decision to take drugs is voluntary for most people, but repeated drug use can lead to brain changes that challenge an addicted person’s self-control and interfere with their ability to resist intense urges to take drugs. These brain changes can be persistent, which is why drug addiction is considered a “relapsing” disease. In other words, people in recovery from drug use disorders are at increased risk for returning to drug use even after years of not taking the drug.  (Source: National Institute on Drug Abuse; National Institutes of Health; U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.) (Click here to learn about the myths and facts of addiction)

Even though relapse is common in addiction recovery, just like relapses in other chronic illnesses such as diabetes and high blood pressure, it is not inevitable. A common misconception is that you relapse when you go back to using or drinking.

However, relapse is a process rather than an event, and it starts long before you actually pick up the drink or drug. Instead of relying on good luck and will power, hoping relapse doesn’t happen to you or believing relapse won’t happen to you, you can take more control of your recovery by learning about triggers and relapse warning signs to proactively prevent it from happening.

Here are some common relapse warning signs:

1. Dishonesty and/or keeping secrets.

It can begin with little lies to others. You may find yourself lying more and covering up lies with more lies. You might be struggling with something or feel depressed but you keep it a secret. You don’t allow others into your life. A popular saying in Alcoholics Anonymous goes: “You are only as sick as your secrets.”

2. Reservation about having the disease/problem.

  • “Maybe I am cured.”
  • “Maybe I don’t have this problem after all.”
  • “I can have a glass of wine now. It is no big deal“

3. Boredom and/or disappointment with sobriety.

You’ve been working really hard on maintaining sobriety. You go to treatment, go to meetings, journal, make amends, so on and so forth, but there is not much joy. You still have a bunch of problems you have to deal with. As a result, you feel like sobriety does not deliver what you expect from all that hard work.

4. Exhaustion.

You allow yourself to get too tired and do not take care of yourself by healthy eating and adequate sleeping. 

5. Complacency.

You may think: “Everything is going well. I’ve got this.” “I have nothing to be afraid of. I beat it.” “It is kind of easy. I don’t have to worry about it anymore.”

6. Instant gratification.

Since you have changed and worked really hard, you expect others to change instantly with you. “Why are they still not trusting me? Can’t they see that I have changed?” Or you want things to happen right here right now. “I should have a good job by now.” “I need to have my dream house.” When you don’t get the instant gratification, you feel frustrated or resentful.

7. Letting up on daily disciplines.

All the things you do on a regular basis, whether it be prayers, meditation, meetings, or self-reflection, become less important. Other things seem to be more of a priority and demand more attention from you. Daily disciplines lose consistency, and then gradually become non-existent.

8. Self-pity.

  • “Why do I have to deal with it?”
  • “Why are all things happening to me?”
  • “Nobody cares about me.”
  • “They never appreciates what I do.“

9. Blaming others.

You start to blame other people or other things but yourself for your problems. By doing so, you stop taking responsibility for your own behaviors and choices. Moreover, if you don’t think it is your responsibility, you are less likely to think about solutions that you can implement to solve the problem.

10. Fantasizing about using/drinking.

You think about “the good times” when you were using. It was so much fun at the beginning. You think about how using “helped” you in the past. You focus on the short-term effects and ignore the long-term consequences.

11. Reverting to old behaviors.

Old behaviors are triggers and fuel for addiction as they either came from your addiction or supported your addiction at one point. Your old behaviors may include isolation, not following recommendations, being judgmental, being argumentative, hanging around people you used with, etc. 

12. Cross addiction.

You develop other obsessions and compulsions, such as over working, over exercising, and over eating. You increase your use of over-the-counter medications or prescription drugs.  

So look back on your recovery journey and examine your current life. What relapse warning signs do you see?

It can also be helpful to talk to your support system to get their perspectives and what they have observed in you. Once you figure out your relapse warning signs, let your support system know too as they may be able to spot a sign in you before you become aware of it. 

If you find yourself in relapse mode, great, commend yourself on having good insights and self-awareness. Now is the time for you to take some action.

  • talk about it and ask for help
  • pick up on daily disciplines, such as journaling, meditation, and reading recovery literature
  • follow the recommendations from your sponsor or other positive supports